Kay is contantly writing about random and weird things that go on in her tiny town, and while our lives are so different with me being in the big city and her in tiny town... my drive to work made me think holy crap we live in two different universes.  You see, Kay has scary neighbors that fish in their grass and use riding lawn mowers as a means to run and get a gallon of milk (or beer as it were, whatever).  I on the other hand, make my way to work through the city passing homeless people, crazy people and DEAD people.  Did you catch that?  Dead people.  People that are no longer living and just happen to be laying on the street. 

 

I live and work in downtown Atlanta, a metropolitan area of over 4 million people.  Traffic sucks, lines are long, everything costs twice as much as it does 20 miles away and apparently dead people are everywhere.  Look, I know about small town life, I lived it for 18 years.  Small town life does not involve a plethora of dead people on the street!  On my way to work this morning, I drive past Centennial Park (where the 1996 Olympics were held).  There is a huge cement/granite type block in one of the entrances, some sort of artistic monument hailing someone who did something in the city at some point, I am sure.  Atop of this block was a man, he was on his back with his legs hanging over the side and his arms spread straight out.  There were 7 policeman standing around him and he was dead.  Dead.  My office is located in a highrise that overlooks Centennial Park.  My office overlooks a dead man on a block.  The police were doing nothing to conceal his deadness.  The did however cover up his shoe with a bag.  Hmmmm....  I saw them do this.  It was odd, they did not cover up the DEAD man, but his shoe.  What was in that shoe?  Was his foot still in the shoe?  No.  Hmmm.... I would hate to see a shoe on the way to work, nevermind the dead man.

 

This is not an uncommon occurrence.  About a week ago as I was pulling into the parking garage under my office there was dead woman lying on the street.  The authorities had not arrived at the scene yet.  Dead woman, on street.  Just laying there, dead.  A month ago I walked to lunch with my coworkers and passed a man that looked as if he were asleep.  On our way back the police were standing around him because he wasn't just taking a nap, it was a dirt nap.  Holy hell.  Summertime comes and all the homeless people start dying on the street.  I am not kidding.  I would think it would be winter.  Nope!  Heatwaves grip the city and they drop like flies or get shot or overdose on drugs or stabbed or beaten or mugged. 

 

I keep forgetting why I love the city so much.  It is hard to enjoy the hustle and bustle with dead people all over the place.  Not that I have anything againgst dead people.  I just don't think they should be on the street, in the open, while their shoes are being covered up. 

 

On the other hand, some funny shit goes down.  Not too long ago a streaker took off through the park screaming like his hair was on fire.  Highly amusing since he was like 300 pounds and didn't get very far before the cops got him.  I would have hated to be the cop that tackled that guy!  Ew. 

 

Then there is the woman we call the crackerfarian.  She is an old, old white woman who has the most amazingly long dreads and dresses like a rastafarian.  She walks the streets until it is time to go to work and then she gets in her motorized wheel chair and begs for money on the corners. 

 

A man in Little Five Points went crazy one day and decided to end his life by jumping out of the window.  Problem was, he was on the first floor.  He then proceeded to get extremely angry and had a fist fight with a holly bush.  The bush won I guess because he went to jail.

 

Not too long ago two women got into an altercation while stuck in traffic.  They got out of their cars and proceeded to have it out.  Finally, traffic started to move and one of them was so upset she laid down in front of the other woman's car to stop her from moving in traffic.  The other woman got in her car and ran over her.

 

Seriously, I could go on forever!